In recent days, in his daily meditations, Matthew Fox has been offering thoughts on toxic masculinity and how it manifests itself in today’s society. Given the recent death of poet Robert Bly, Rev. Fox has been examining some of Mr. Bly’s writings related to this topic of toxic masculinity. A number of years ago, I was part of a men’s breakfast group in which we read and discussed books related to men’s issues, one of which was Bly’s Iron John. I appreciated his thoughts, derived from fairy tales, of the father wound that we men often carry. Like so many aspects of our shadows, failure to expose and examine our woundedness can lead to an approach to others that Ken Wilber expressed as “Fu*k it or kill it,” both of which involve violenc.

As Rev. Fox, a former Catholic Dominican priest and leading voice of creation spirituality, has offered in his meditations, this unexamined toxic wound leads to the kind of fascism and authoritarianism that is so evident today in the U.S. and the rest of the Western world.

We, men in particular, must speak out against and stand up to the fascist expression of masculinity that we see infecting politics and other avenues of our lives, including some of our religious organizations. I am discouraged by the influence that the former president and his minions have had on how we approach elections, gun rights, our racist and sexist history, and education. But, rather than sit and moan, I raise my voice to say that this is not who we are at our core. If we look deeply enough we will find the compassion and wisdom that lies within, but we must take time to look deeply and honestly, and show forth a masculinity that is loving, respectful, and wise.